Just Start. Make the flyer. Write the post. Make the business cards. It’s what I tell myself every time this haunting feeling of “do something more” creeps up on me. But do I do it? No. My heart begins to race, and my anxieties begin to rise. I can’t do this. I can’t start a business. I can’t ask for people’s money. And so, the thoughts of rising above my gray cubical begin to quickly fade.
With all the back and forth that I struggle with in actually starting my business, this weekend, I found myself extremely encouraged in what God has given me the passion to do. A few months ago, my cousin asked if I would be able to do her graduation photos. I said yes right away, excited for the opportunity to really see what I could do. At the same time, I was scared out of my mine. Why would I agree to provide my amateur service to do something so important? Graduation photos. That’s a moment that marks a milestone in someone’s life and I was going to try and capture it.
I was afraid, but I prayed. I had already been practicing on the kids in my neighborhood and I had been gaining some slight confidence. But now, It was showtime. I found myself slightly relieved when I learned that she would actually have another photographer there too. A friend of my cousins who had agreed to take photos of her at the school, while I would take pictures of her at the beach. This friend was another graduating senior who had been doing photography for 6 years! Let’s not even talk about my minor 8 months of watching photography YouTube videos. But in watching her work, I was able to ease drop. I took some photos from the sidelines out of fear because I was afraid of getting in her way. After a few moments, she was inviting me along to take the same photos with my camera just after she did with hers and I became so excited with the results. My confidence rose, and my excitement reached a peak.
For so long I had been interested in photography, but I did not think it was my gift. I’m the “video” girl at my church. Below are the pictures that I took for my cousin’s senior portraits. I think God is clearly showing me that I am able to do beyond what I could ever imagine. I just need to trust Him, and start.